‘Anaconda’ review: Jack Black and Paul Rudd get jungle fever in limp comedy-horror satire

Dir: Tom Gormican. US. 2025. 98mins

Two ageing friends decide to rediscover their spark in the most ill-advised way in horror-comedy Anaconda. Jack Black and Paul Rudd play the buddies, who try to revive their aborted Hollywood dreams by shooting a shoestring-budget remake of the 1997 horror film of the same name, blithely traveling to the Amazon and putting their lives in danger. The Unbearable Weight Of Massive Talent director Tom Gormican once again latches on to a meta-movie idea with great comic potential, but this limp satire of vain actors, deluded filmmakers and shamelessly recycled IP quickly starts to sputter.

Succumbs to the worst tendencies of reboots

Rolling out globally from December 25, Anaconda might draw comparisons to other knowingly self-referential reboots such as 21 Jump Street, except in Gormican’s film, the participants are aware of the property they’re remaking — or, as one character puts it pretentiously, that they’re using as the inspiration for a “spiritual sequel.” The star power of Black and Rudd will attract viewers, as will a general cultural awareness of the 1997 Anaconda, featuring Jennifer Lopez and Ice Cube, which is fondly remembered for its cheesy effects and woeful dialogue. This new Anaconda has some scares but is principally a comedy, which should help at the box office at a time when there is not a great deal of lighter fare.

Doug (Black) and Griff (Rudd) grew up together making short films, with Doug serving as director and Griff being his leading man. But that childhood passion has faded away: Doug is now married with kids, unhappily reduced to shooting wedding videos, while Griff has struggled to establish an acting career in Los Angeles. Then one day, Griff surprises his old friend with shocking news, announcing he has managed to get the underlying rights to 1997’s Anaconda, a film these horror-obsessed buddies love. Along with two other childhood chums, alcoholic Kenny (Steve Zahn) and newly divorced Claire (Thandiwe Newton), they impetuously put their disappointing lives on hold to film a new version of the story in the heart of the Brazilian rainforest.

Initially, this Anaconda promises to be a droll look at a bunch of incompetent artists heading off to disaster. Gormican and co-writer Kevin Etten enjoy skewering their characters’ dubious aspirations, not to mention Hollywood’s fixation on rebooting/reimagining anything it can. Once the foursome arrive in the Amazon, they realise how ill-equipped they are to make a formidable film. Not only is Doug a terrible writer, but Griff quickly reveals himself to be a hammy actor.

Even worse, the real anaconda they are working with proves to be more complicated than they anticipated, and then there’s the worrisome matter of an even larger snakes hiding in the jungle waiting to ambush them. Gormican stages a few decent jump scares but, even in those instances, he invites the viewer to giggle at his buffoonish characters as they run for their lives.

The Unbearable Weight Of Massive Talent cast Nicolas Cage to play an (even more) exaggerated version of himself in an action-comedy that riffed on stardom, action-movie cliches and Cage’s cult appeal. But where that inconsistent but clever satire was enlivened by Cage’s winning rapport with Pedro Pascal’s superfan criminal, Anaconda lacks similarly sharp characters. Doug and Griff’s midlife crisis plays out predictably, and their buried resentment toward one another leads to few chuckles once they finally hash out their differences. Likewise, Zahn’s one-note loser is just the actor’s latest portrayal of a high/foolish layabout. Newton has some nice scenes as Claire, who used to date Griff when they were younger, but she barely has a chance to develop the character once the plot complications kick in.

Anaconda eventually introduces a sly twist that answers a question audiences may have regarding how someone as unconnected as Griff could possibly land the rights to the original film. But Gormican fails to capitalise on the surprise, ultimately succumbing to the worst tendencies of reboots rather than viciously or lovingly sending them up.

Equally, Doug and Griff’s feeble attempts to shoot The Anaconda don’t lead to fresh insights about the egos and insecurities of creative types — especially ones as untalented as these two. By the time Anaconda resorts to big fright scenes and chase sequences during an unimaginative final reel, the film’s initial charm feels as strangulated as the titular reptile’s victims.